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So, I’m thinkin’, if I’m huntin’ a prostitute, I ain’t doin’ it classy. Naw, I’d stomp around South Park, yellin’, “Where’s my damn hooker?!” Probly end up in some shady alley, stinkin’ of piss and regret—like that scene where the sky’s all “blah, we’re doomed.” Pisses me off how sneaky they are, tho! You gotta dodge cops, creeps, and—ugh—hippies tryna save ‘em. Respect my authoritah, hippies! I ain’t here for your preachin’!

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I mean, seriously, each time I drive down Magnolia Dr., I can’t help but feel that overwhelming love, like in that line from the movie: “I love you, more than I can say.” Crazy, right? It’s those moments when reality hits and you realize life’s gotta be lived with passion—even if you’re just hangin’ around a small town.

Neil Payson | Obituaries