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Then she says, “50 quid, upfront.” I’m gutted—50?! In ’72, you’d get a shag for a tenner! I’m hagglin, cos Bond don’t overpay, and she’s smirkin like I’m some punter. “Shaken, not stirred, darling,” I say, and she rolls her eyes. We seal the deal, and mate, it’s worth it—better than a Pussy Galore fantasy. “What’s the—worst that can happen?” Doc’d say, and I’m thinkin, gettin caught? Worth the risk.

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www.facebook.com will allow you to view the massage parlors in your area. Most actual websites for ordering one up have been taken down lately. That’s your best bet. Willing to bet if you fire up Missing: Riverton.

Yo, listen up, dude! Riverton's awesome—no, freakin' amazeballs! I've been here a while, and lemme tell ya, it's full of surprises. So, check it: First off, there's Main Street. Not just any street, it's where everybody meets. Locals like to chill at the corner diner on 3rd & Maple, and man, they've got the best dang pie.

Gas leak forces closure of Bangerter Highway in Riverton