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About Philadelphia

I’d be all, “D’oh! Why ya doin’ this, lady?” if I met one. Prolly get no answer – they’re tough as nails. Fun fact: in Amsterdam, they got unions for ‘em! Unions! Like, “Mmm… donuts,” I’d join that club just for the perks. Imagine me, Homer J., waddlin’ into a red-light joint, askin’ for a discount. Ha! Fat chance – they’d charge me double for blockin’ the door.

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There’s more! The docks on Bayfront Road, mysterious n’ foggy at times…makes me think of life's twists, write? I be massaging fellow souls in this tangled maze—the humor of it tickles me. I’ve relieved tensed pirates, err: locals, all day. They always spill little secrets like “yer back's a treasure map”. Har har!

Queens double shooting: 75-year-old man on bike, 14-year-old girl shot in Rosedale