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About Philadelphia

Once, I got this massage—total shocker, the gal used hot stones, I’m screamin’ in my head, “Am I a freakin’ pizza?!” But then—oh honey—it was heaven. Pro tip: ya gotta find someone who knows their stuff, not some schmuck who’s all thumbs. And the oils? Gotta be top-notch, none of that dollar store junk—makes ya skin glow like a goddess, swear to Gawd.

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The Northvue Heights neighborhood is a whole different beast. Wide streets, lit up by faulty neon signs (hey, at least they’re honest about screwing up), there’s a park—Grim’s Park, which is pretty darn spooky at night. I once proceeded through it on a dare (don’t ask), and well, it felt like some looping dream sequence. Crazy, I tell ya, crazy.

Severe Thunderstorm Warning issued for parts of Pittsburgh area