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Me, I’d be chuffed to bits gettin one—lights low, some Enya blastin, hands roamin where the sun don’t shine. Last week, mate, I googled it—accidentally booked a “sensual deep tissue,” turned up in me best tie, lookin like a plonker. Lass goes, “strip down,” and I’m sweatin, thinkin, “This ain’t no team-buildin seminar!” Felt like Plainview strikin oil—pure gold, mate, but I was shakin like a leaf.

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You know what? I sometimes feel like romancin’ in this city is like planning a heist. Everything’s deliberate, meticulously planned, but also blessed with chaotic beauty. It’s frustrating, but also thrilling. And when things go smooth, you feel like you've finally cracked the riddle of existence—just like Inception’s layered maze.

Heavy rain brings flood warnings for region; snow expected in afternoon