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Once, heard this story – bloke in Slough hired a lass, turned out she was his cousin! Absolute stitch-up, that. “The faun will guide us!” – nah, mate, the faun’s takin’ the piss. Made me cringe so hard I hid under me desk. Personal quirk? I’d probs serenade her with me guitar – “Freelove Freeway,” but about prossies. Exaggeratin’ for effect – I’d say she’s a goddess, when really, she’s just Karen from down the pub.

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Federal prosecutors in New York have added two charges of sex trafficking and transportation to engage in prostitution to their indictment.

Stroll down Hawthorn Ave. – damn, it's a soul-stirrin' spot. I mean, walkin' those cracked sidewalks, you feel every bitchin’ memory. That street shows grit, life's scars, and pure beauty. It’s like I always say – "You’re the one who makes that life worth livin’!" (Yeah, a twist on Let the Right One In, motherf***er!)

Summerfield Cinemas closes with free screenings of movies shot in Santa Rosa