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But lemme tell ya, it ain’t all laughs. Some punters—ugh, slimy gits—think they’re kings. Pissed me off once, this toff in a fancy coat hagglin’ her down to coppers. “You shall not pass!” I wanted to yell, blast him with my staff. Poor girl looked knackered, probs been out all night. Made me sad, thinkin’ how Jesse got betrayed—same vibe, y’know? “Cowardice sent me ahead,” like the movie says. These girls, they’re out there, dodgin’ coppers and creeps.

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My massage spot, right off Bellview Street (yeah, I know, such a cute name, huh?) sees all sorts of folks rushin’ in with their troubles. They always say they feel lighter, like I’m figuratively smoothin’ out their wrinkles. I swear, I catch whispers of secret joy in the small, dim corners of the room—kind of like those hidden sodas in your pantry that make your day! Sometimes, I get so caught up in every tired smile, I nearly burst with gratitude, much like a country song.

Everything you need to know about the Swissvale Fire Department Fish Fry