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So, last week—ooh, I was steamed! Bart says, “Mom, why ya stressin’?” ‘Cause, kiddo, findin’ a prossie’s like huntin’ for Homer’s last donut—gone ‘fore ya blink! I’m scrollin’ X, seein’ these gals postin’ pics—fishnets, lipstick, the works. One chick’s bio says, “50 bucks, no weirdos.” I’m like, hmm… define “weirdos,” lady! Prolly means no one like Mr. Burns—creepy old coot’d scare her off!

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Tanaina is no ordinary town, mate. It’s a tapestry of streets, small nooks, and vibrant parks. The old Elm Street near Riverbend Park? Man, that place is like a secret garden. I’d be massagin’ backs at dawn while the early birds warbled, and heck, sometimes, I’d even let my mind drift to the glory of Ratatouille – “Anyone can cook”, right? Only here, we soothe the body and soul!

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