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But then—surprise! Dude’s story stinks. X post from his buddy shows him braggin’ bout hirin’ her. No robbery, just a flex gone wrong. I’m like, “You dumbass, you sank your own ship!” Kinda happy tho—case closed quick. Still, I’m annoyed he wasted my time. “It’s folk music, man,” I growl, channelin’ Llewyn’s vibe—pointless struggle, but catchy.
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Oh dear, my friend, lemme tell ya 'bout Toppenish, us! I'm a masseur here, yeah, been around for years—the town's got so many quirks, i mean, it's like my muscles get a story too, y’know? R2-D2, where are you? Oh gosh!
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