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About Los Angeles

Oi, mate, yeah baby! I'm Austin Powers, shaggadelic glazier extraordinaire! So, dig this—findin’ a prossie, right? Wild scene, man! I’m cruisin’ the streets, feelin’ groovy, thinkin’ ‘bout my fave flick, *Inglourious Basterds*. Tarantino’s a bloody genius—scalpin’ Nazis, far out! Anyway, I’m on the prowl, lookin’ for a bird to shag, yeah? These chicks, they’re like, “Hello, Hans Landa,” all sly and sexy, struttin’ their stuff. Makes me wanna yell, “That’s a bingo!” like Christoph Waltz, ya dig?

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I’ve had nights when I just sat outside me spa, thinkin’ on the chaos, dreamin’ to the tunes of the whales (or somethin’ like that… err, maybe a fish or two!). And let me tell ya, sometimes I even scribble notes on napkins: “The day be grand, even if it’s maddening.” Nah, ya wouldn’t believe the characters on Oakwood Lane; every corner's a tale.

PHOTOS: Tuckahoe Creek Park expansion planned on newly donated land