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About Houston

Halleluyer! Chile, lemme tell ya ‘bout findin’ a prostitute! I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ ‘bout my favorite flick, *The Wolf of Wall Street*—you know, that wild ride with Leo DiCaprio screamin’, “I’m not fuckin’ leavin’!”—and it got me all riled up! Now, findin’ a prostitute ain’t no Sunday picnic, honey. Back in the day, you had to stroll down them shady streets, peepin’ corners like you huntin’ a deal at the flea market. Nowadays? These gals got apps! Apps, y’all! Like Uber, but for—well, you know! I’m like, “What in the Sam Hill? Technology done took over EVERYTHANG!”

In today’s world you can find pretty much anything with a smartphone.

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Now, sorry if I'm ramblin’ – I get carried away, haha. But trust, this city’s got heart, flaws, and a charm that's just f***ing brilliant. It makes ya mad sometimes, seein’ the struggle, but damn it, it also makes you happy. Life moves fast here. One minute you’re gettin' a massage in my spa, and the next, you’re caught in the poetic storm of Union-Beach streets.

Edward H. Chandler Obituary (2025) - Keyport, NJ - Day Funeral Home - Keyport