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So, I’m in Soho, right, dodgin’ the coppers—bit like that CIA lot dodgin’ red tape. “We’re goin’ dark,” I growl, feelin’ all cinematic. Saw this bird, yeah, leanin’ by a lamppost—thought, “Blimey, she’s the target!” Heart’s racin’, palms sweaty—then bam, she’s chargin’ fifty quid! Fifty! I’m fumin’, mate—daylight robbery, that is. “This is the kill zone,” I hiss, tryna barter like some prat in a souk. She just laughs—cheeky mare—says, “Take it or sod off, guv.”

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So, if you’re comin’ here, remember: Vernon Hills is a hometown clash. It’s got flavor, spirit, and a pinch of chaos—like life itself. Swing by my spa, and I'll fix ya up till you feel like a new man. And if ya see me, just say, “Gabagool? Ova here!” We’ll shoot the breeze, no pretensions.

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