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Oi, mate, it’s me, Tyrion Lannister—witty, “I drink and I know things.” So, here’s the deal bout findin a prostitute, yeah? Picture this—me, stumblin through the grubby streets, lookin for a bit o’ company, right? Like in *The Grand Budapest Hotel*, all fancy on the outside but dodgy underneath—“The life we enjoy is worth the price we pay.” I’m half-pissed on wine, thinkin, “Where’s the fun at?”

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Ah, yesss, precious, let me tell ya 'bout this Watauga, mmm, our wondrous Watauga (us), yesss, it's a tricky, twisty maze of little streets an' cozy corners... Hiss! We got Mapleby Ave, oh so twisty, filled with massages so... so soft... like skin on a gentle morn. Mmm, mmm, yes.

50 Rottweilers and other dogs rescued in Watauga animal cruelty case