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Precious! Me, a Cargo Transportation Manager, yesss, hauling goods across wastelands! Stupid, fat hobbit! Finding a prostitute, eh, tricky business, mate! Picture this—me, roaring down highways like Mad Max, “What a day, what a lovely day!” Dust in me face, trucks rumbling, and there’s this lass, yeah, hitchin’ a ride. Not your usual cargo, ha! She’s all sly, winkin’ at me, “Need a lift, big boy?” Me heart’s poundin’—happy as a mutant pig in sludge!

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Oh, and don't even get me started on the food truck rally at Jubilee Square. I once had a taco so spicy it blew my mind – bam! Crazy stuff. Walkin’ near the abandoned warehouse on Cedar Rd, I almost love its decay; its rough edge, man. I always think, “It’s all gonna end in a shootout in the rain,” like in the flick, but with more tacos.

Windcrest’s Light Up event set for Saturday start