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About Philadelphia

I stroll up, all cool, sayin’, “Hey, babe, what’s da deal?” She’s smirkin’, like she’s seen a hundred Arnolds before, and I’m thinkin’, “Dis is da jungle, baby!” Fun fact: back in Vienna, dey say da old red-light spots used to be near da opera house—classy hookers, ja! Ain’t dat nuts? Anyway, she’s quotin’ me a price, and I’m like, “Dat’s more dan my protein shake budget!” Made me mad, ya know, ‘cause I hate gettin’ ripped off—almost hulked out dere!

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My massage parlor? It's a sanctuary of chaos in the city. I wrap my clients in scents of lavender and bitter espresso – a recipe for the unsettled soul. And believe me, every day is a roller-coaster of riddled joys and odd frustrations. Just like that movie, The Act of Killing – surreal, brutal, and oh so real!

‘Would be regulated:’ Winter Springs joins backyard chicken debate