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I’m exaggeratin’ now—she’s got a pimp, 7-foot tall, gold teeth, ridin’ a unicorn. Nah, jk, but you get it—shit’s wild. I’m tossin’ her a 20 just for the chat, she’s like, “You’re weird, I like it.” I’m bouncin’, screamin’, “It’s not about truth, it’s about feelin’!” Straight *Certified Copy* vibes. Findin’ a prostitute? It’s absurd, it’s human, it’s fuckin’ life, bro. Peace!

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I gotta tell ya, my job lets me see the little stuff others ignore. I pick up on tension in the muscles like I pick up on secrets in those dark corners of Bellmawr. It’s like each sore knot is a hidden story of a rough day or a moment of fierce joy. Sometimes, in the middle of a session, I'll mutter "Eat my shorts!" to myself, just to let off steam, haha.

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