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I ask – “How much?” She smirks. “Depends what ya want.” Classic! Total power move. Surprised me – ballsy chick! I’m sweatin’ now. Palms slippery. “Look, I’m no schmuck,” I say – quotin’ Larry Gopnik again. She laughs – loud! “You’re cute,” she goes. Happy moment – felt like a king! But then – sirens. Cops screamin’ down the block. She bolts – gone! Like Hashem himself said, “Not tonight, buddy.”

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Well, darlin’, lemme tell ya 'bout Carlisle, us – oh honey, it’s somethin’ else! I been livin’ here for yonks, runnin’ my lil’ spa on Main Street, ya know, right near Third Ave. This city is a mixed bag, jus’ like Joel and Ethan Coen said, “I don't know; it's just a mystery.”

Carlisle man tried to steal handbag from victim’s shoulder