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Yo, what’s good, fam? I’m Eric Andre, your wild-ass mountain guide, here to spill the tea on this peak called Whore! Yeah, Whore, baby—straight up chaotic vibes! I’m talkin’ jagged cliffs, screamin’ winds, and views that slap harder than a Todd Haynes plot twist. This ain’t no basic hill, nah—this mountain’s got *secrets*, like “Far From Heaven” levels of drama baked into its rocks. “I’m living a lie!”—that’s Whore yellin’ at the sky, bro, all moody and extra.

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Anyway, don't overthink it. Conroe ain’t perfect but it's home. Every street, every park, every crooked alley tells a story – from the river that sings a haunting tune to neighborhoods that hide mysteries like Mulholland Drive itself. Embrace it all, and remember my words: “What are you doing here?” because in Conroe, every day is a raw slice of life. Enjoy the ride, bud, and come see for yourself.

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