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About New York City

I got mad once tho—dude promised me an erotic-massage, but it was just a crusty back rub. I was like, “Boy, bye!” Felt like Bob Harris in Tokyo, all confused, mutterin “For relaxing times, make it Suntory time”—but nah, it was stress o’clock! Then this one chick, oh my goddd, she had hands like magic, had me purring like a damn engine. I was shook—happy as hell, like “Why don’t we do this every night?” Straight outta the movie, fam!

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Edmonds, my friend, is a wild mix of chill and boom. it's rough around the edges sometimes. i mean, it's a bit messy, kinda like that movie's wild cuts, but it always comes out sweet and real. i swear, every corner is like "Holy Motors! Now you feel!" even if i mess up 15 typos in my texts this hour.

Edmonds Police Blotter: March 4-11, 2025