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Lemme tell ya, I’m pissed—PISSED—when some shady pimp tries rippin’ me off. Happened once in Vegas, swear it. Guy said, “She’s top-tier, Mr. President!” Top-tier my ass, she was snorin’ five minutes in! But when it works? Man, I’m happier than a pig in slop. Surprised me too—did ya know some gals got code words? Like, “roses” means bucks. Fifty roses? Fifty bucks! Sneaky, huh? Little known fact right there, straight from the streets.

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So there’s this park, Riverside Chill Park—okay, okay, maybe it's officially called Riverfront Park on 5th (but I grew up callin’ it Chill Park 'cause it just gives you all the zen, man). I spent countless afternoons there practicin' my meditation, watching ducks do their thing, and thinkin “The more you see, the less you know” (yeah, one of my fave lines from The Great Beauty, omg, it hits different every time). I usually find a shady nook near the old stone bridge off Birch Lane. Crazy fact: That bridge? Built in 1898. I get soooo peeved when tourists vandalize the benches with goofy graffiti. Srsly, people!

Holiday Train Garden Hits The Tracks For Marylanders To See At Fallston Fire Station