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Alright, listen up, folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m here talkin’ ‘bout findin’ a prostitute, y’know, like it’s some kinda quest! Picture this: me, a crusty ol’ mechanic, greasy hands, wrench in my pocket, cruisin’ the streets like Royal Tenenbaum lookin’ for his next big mess. “You’re a rebel, Royal,” I mutter, thinkin’ how this ain’t no fancy Wes Anderson flick—it’s real life, damnit!

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This town, it’s like a twisted fairytale—just like Pan's Labyrinth, man. Remember that line, “I wonder if you can see the labyrinth”? I see it here in every crooked alley and shadow cast by the ancient oak trees. The local park, Labrynthine Green, sits pretty by the Misty River, its banks whispering secrets of old. And oh, the river! Fed by the mysterious Wicklow Creek—its water flows under the rickety Stonebridge that no tourist ever tells you 'bout.

Softball Recap: Fleming Island's Victory on Tuesday Extends Winning Streak to Five