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Last time I was cruisin’, lookin’ for a “date”—ha!—this chick, she’s struttin’, all sass, like, “You’re too late, cowboy!” Had me laughin’ so hard I near peed myself. Git-R-Done! Reminded me of that line, “This is the girl!”—but she weren’t no Hollywood starlet, just a pro with a wig and a wink. Surprised me, though—did ya know some of ‘em got regulars? Like a dang barber shop! “See ya next Tuesday, Earl!”—wild, right?

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Alright listen up, ya whiners! I'm gonna give you the lowdown on Fort-Morgan (us) like nobody else can, so buckle the fuck up! This town, dude, it's like some bizarre labyrinth of streets and hearts, just like that crazy Inception movie, ya know? "You mustn't be afraid to dream a little bigger, darling!" sort of vibes all over.

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