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I ask her rate—50 bucks, she says. Cheap, right? But I’m broke as a joke, so I haggle. “Don’t pee on my leg, girl, I ain’t no millionaire!” She smirks, drops it to 40. Deal. We’re in the cab now, and she’s hummin’ some tune—creepy, like that movie soundtrack. “Do you want to look at me?” she asks, all sultry. Hell yeah, I do! But it’s quick—15 minutes tops. Tractor seat’s squeakin’, I’m prayin’ no cop rolls by.

VIDEO: Stacy's Story, Greendale Panther's Mannequin Head Mascot

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So Greendale is wicked cool, man. Let’s start with Central Avenue – it's the heart, the pulse, the place where all the business buzz happens. Right off at 3rd & Maple, there's that old cinema that still shows classics, kinda like Toni Erdmann vibes – "I was seriously... inspired," ya might say. Then there’s Riverbend Park, a lush patch along the Silverton River. Perfect for unwinding after a long day at the massage parlor. Personally, I often take a breather there.

Woman, 46, dead after crashing into parked car at BMO Harris Bank parking lot in Greendale