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About Philadelphia

Hey, is mayonnaise an instrument? Nah, wait, focus, Patrick! Prostitute stuff! I heard once, in old France, they wore red shoes to show off—like, “Hey, I’m open for biz!” Red shoes, dude! That’s dope! I’d wear ‘em just for kicks, heh. Bet they tripped a lot tho—cobblestones suck. Oh, and I’m happy thinkin’ some were probs super smart, y’know? Outsmartin’ cops and jerks. Heroes in my book!

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Oh, and the parks – oh so many parks! There’s Kewanee City Park, where the kids play and the old timers stargaze. Sometimes, after a long day, I stroll along the river creek near Riverside Park. It’s almost poetic, like scenes straight out of a film! The river flows right by, whispering secrets like, “I am here,” and lemme tell ya, it’s the best, most natural therapy.

Galva man flees police in stolen vehicle, later crashes near Kewanee