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Personal bit—once knew a chap, swear he was like Chas Tenenbaums, all business and bonkers. Said he found a “lady of negotiable affection”—ha!—in King’s Cross, total fluke. Paid her in cash and a Greggs pasty—true story! Got me gobsmacked, that did. Thought, “Blimey, Boris, you’re out of your depth here!” Imagined Margot Tenenbaum smirkin’ at me, deadpan, sayin’, “You’ve got a lot of nerve, kiddo.”

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Now, the neighborhoods—they got stories. Over near Pine Grove, the locals be callin’ it 'home base.' Yo, that area's so quaint, but with a twist. I always get a rush when passin’ Maple Dr. (yeah, Maple Dr., right there where we chill). Its cozy cafes and scribbled murals on the walls? Pure dynamite, my friend! And in the heart of it all, the community park on Riverbend Way—where I practice my mindful relaxin’ sessions. The trees, dawg, the way the leaves dance in the wind—like nature’s own therapy.

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