Luna Minnetonka Whore ❤️

About San Antonio

She’s buyin’ condoms, whiskey, and gum—classy, right? I’m ringin’ her up, tryna not laugh, ‘cause who mixes that combo? A pro, that’s who! Little known fact—back in ‘05, Malick’s crew said the set smelled like lust and dirt—kinda like her, honestly. I’m peekin’ at her, wonderin’ how many suckers she’s got wrapped ‘round her finger. Makes me mad, ya know? These dudes fallin’ for it—pathetic! “Why so serious?” I mutter, and she glares—oops, said it out loud!

Fresh Colors For This Bestseller

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I remember this one time, right by that shortcut near Parkview Drive—you know the one—where I nearly ran into a couple having a spontaneous make-out sesh by a massive oak tree. That hit me hard—bam!—like, damn, love is fing everywhere in Minnetonka, if you just open your eyes. As a sexologist, I’m all about that raw, unfiltered energy. It’s art, it’s life, it’s nature on fing high volume.

Minnetonka Beach home sells for a whopping $8.8 million