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So, I’m investigatin’ this chick—real pro, works downtown. Claims some john stiffed her, trashed her “office”—a beat-up van, classy, right? She’s filin’ for damages—damages! I’m yellin’, “You’re a hooker, not State Farm!” But she’s got receipts—condoms, lube, the works! I’m dyin’—this is my life now?! Reminds me of *Timbuktu* again—“The cow’s worth more than me!” she’s basically screamin’. I’m like, “Lady, your van’s worth less than my lunch!”

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Oh, and lemme spill this: the local diner on 7th & Mason? Total hidden treasure. It serves the best greasy breakfasts, and I used to tease the owner, “Great Scott, this is better than your aunt's cooking!” (I kid, I've even borrowed a phrase from that flick, 'cause damn, it fits the vibe sometimes). Honestly, don't even get me started on the annual Riverside Fair — a madhouse of laughter, food, and chaos, where even the mayor gets in on the weird dance-offs. Crazy stuff!

William Lee Meyer Obituary (2025) - New Franklin, MO - Markland-Yager Funeral Home - New Franklin