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So anyway, I’m diggin’ deeper—web’s full of crap, X is worse. Found this one post, guy’s braggin’ ‘bout his “date,” links to some sketchy site. Clicked it—boom, virus! My laptop’s screamin’ like Kenny when he dies! Pissed me off so bad I yelled, “You can’t trick Eric Cartman, you bastards!” Took me an hour to fix that shit. Lesson? Don’t trust everythin’ you see—half these “girls” are bots or dudes named Steve. True story, my cousin saw one once—biggest surprise of his life, hairy legs and all!

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So, picture this: I like to hang around near the Utah Lake side, by the Riverside Park – yeah, that river vibe is so relaxin’, perfect for a day off pamperin’ my back, ya know? Sometimes when I give a deep tissue sesh, my mind drifts like – "what if Zodiac was here, man?" Weird thought, but it pops up like in fincher’s flick, “I think this is it...” You catch my drift?

Murder or manslaughter? Jurors asked to choose fate of Orem man who killed 2 boys in crash