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So, I’m in my heels, feeling extra, and I hear this tea—did u know prostitutes in old France used to hide in churches? Like, legit, they’d blend with nuns to dodge the cops! Wild, right? I’m shook. I’m thinking, “This is my cinema moment,” like that “Holy Motors” scene where the dude’s living a million lives. I’m, like, “Am I her? Am I me? Fab or fug?”

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Oh, and can we talk about Riverbend Park? Wow, it’s like that scene from Her where he describes the future in a soft, dreamy tone. River flows, smooth and deep, carrying secrets from the heartfelt night rant sessions I have at, like, 2 am. Man, it makes your heart thump, sometimes in a major happy kinda way, sometimes a bit nostalgic.

Red Lion girls never trail in Division I win over Dallastown