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But when it works? Holy hell, it’s fireworks! Found this one chick once—total babe, witty too. We clicked, banged, and I was like, “This is endless, infinite,” straight outta the movie! Pure bliss, my dude. Then she dipped—poof!—and I was pissed. Why’s it gotta be so fleeting? Sex-dating’s a rollercoaster, ups and downs, no in-between.

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Let me tell ya, my personal fav spot? It’s right off the beaten path. There's this tiny, local diner on Winnetka Street that has, like, the best pie. Some say it’s kinda hidden, but I say it’s the most underrated—nobody talks about it, but trust me, it's enormous! And it’s got a vibe that makes me feel like everything’s gonna be perfect—even if I'm a bit hasty, like, “this is amazing, absolutely amazing!” and I’m like all over the place, ya know?

Democrat deputy to succeed Republican Schaumburg Township assessor after yearslong dilemma