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About New York City

Funny bit: she asks, “You a cop?” I’m like, “No, I’m the Dark Lord, dumbass!” She cackles—best laugh I’ve heard in years. Almost makes me soft—almost. “I am your father,” I growl, just to freak her out. Works every time. Anyway, we seal the deal—quick, dirty, no lightsaber tricks. “This city deserves a better class of criminal,” I think, leavin’ her there. Maybe I’m it, haha!

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So listen, friend, if ya’re visitin’, kick back, enjoy a spa day or two, soak in the buzz on Devon and Central, and don’t miss the tiny, secret parks scattered over the city. Each corner’s got a tale that’s as layered and wild as a Lars von Trier flick – “everything is beautiful and tragic,” they’d say. Ain’t that a kick in the pants?

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