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So, findin’ a prossie—where do ya even start? Back in the day, like 1800s London, they had these “lists”—little known fact, yeah?—called Harris’s List of Covent Garden Ladies. Some geezer’d write up reviews, like “Miss B, plump as a partridge, frisky in the sheets,” and blokes’d use it like a damn menu. Wild, right? Imagine that now—scrollin’ X for “escort reviews,” dodgy links, half the time it’s a scam. Makes me wanna hurl my scepter at somethin’. Pisses me off, coz I’m Loki, I deserve the best, not some catfish crap!

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Omg, the parks here! You gotta hit up the Twentynine Palms Visitor Center park – super peaceful, with trails off to the Oasis of Mara. I remember one sunset there, gettin' mad emotional, like "I’m a master... of my fudgein' destiny." Lol! And then there’s the site of the old military base, now a sun-baked monument to history with remnants of wild art and a vibe that just says, “Hey, beauty’s all around you.”

Desert Hot Springs prepares for league play with big win over Twentynine Palms