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Heya, man, so I’m sittin’ here, strummin’ my air guitar—D’oh!—thinkin’ bout *Certified Copy* an’ this weird idea of findin’ a prostitute. Like, what’s real, what’s fake, huh? Kiarostami’s got me all twisted up, y’know, “What is this thing between us?”—that’s what Juliette Binoche says in the flick, an’ I’m like, whoa, deep stuff! Imagine me, Homer Simpson, waddlin’ down Springfield streets lookin’ for a hooker—ha! “Mmm… donuts.”—’cept I’d probly get distracted by a donut shop first.

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Now, lemme get personal – my fave spot is actually by River Park near the old mill on 5th St. It’s so peaceful, yet pulsatin' with life. And oh my gosh, the view of the river is breathtaking. I sometimes think, "I ain't ever seen somethin’ so sexy in nature!" It’s the perfect blend of beauty and raw life energy.

A critical oversight led to a tragic home explosion. But who’s at fault?