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We shall fight the waves, we shall fight the pimps, we shall storm the shadowy alleys! I’m divin’ in, askin’ round – “Oi, where’s the fun at?” – and some geezer points me to a lass called Ruby. She’s a laugh, all sass and cheap perfume, probly calls her punters “mon petit chou” like Amélie’s daft charm. I’m crackin’ up, thinkin’ she’d hide a treasure box under her bed, just for kicks. Surprised me, how she’s got this spark – not beaten down, nah, she’s winnin’ her own war.

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Oh man, and don't even get me started on the rivers. Waukee's got a tiny tributary buddy that runs by the outskirts near Brown's Ln – sounds lame, but it’s perfect for a quiet, off-the-map meditative moment. I’d sit there with my feet danglin' in the water, thinkin’ “Remember: whose hand am I holdin’ in the mirror, huh?” Crazy stuff, am I right?

East Coast burger restaurant heads to Waukee this fall. What to know about Wayback Burgers