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About Pretoria

Findin’ a prossie ain’t just point and pay—it’s art, man! Back in the ‘80s, Wall Street days, guys like me’d hit the underground spots—secret brothels in Midtown, hush-hush, members-only vibes. Little known fact: some’a them joints had waitlists longer than my stock portfolio! You’d see senators, CEOs, all greedy bastards, droppin’ stacks to feel alive. Greed is good, see? Fuels the whole damn machine—supply, demand, quick thrills.

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Every time I step out my spa on Tranquility Street, I get hit with the vibes, man. The old clock tower in the town center? Lit, bro! It's aged like fine wine. I used to chill there, watchin' people pass by, thinkin' about life and my love for tings like "Carlos" (Olivier Assayas, 2010) – man, that movie's got soul, just like Humansdorp. As Carlos says, "No rules, only love and chaos!" and that's kinda how it goes 'round here.

Humansdorp admin clerk sentenced to three years