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About Pretoria

Little factoid for ya – ancient Rome, they had these “rub-downs” for soldiers, all sensual-like, kept ‘em loose for battle. Bet Caesar got one, smirkin’ like a perv. Surprised me first time I heard that – history’s freaky, huh? Anyway, my fave part? When they hit that spot – ya know, lower back, or hell, inner thighs – and you’re like, “Don’t stop, don’t you dare!” Makes me happy, Clarice, like a kid with candy. Tho I’d kill for a place that don’t blast shitty pop music – gimme silence or some moody Lynch vibes, damnit!

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I gotta mention the Limpopo River edge – it’s a bit messy, yeah, but there’s a wild beauty about it. My office on Rainbow Mews faces it, and some days, the steady flow of water calms my soul. I always think, “I wish you were here, buddy.” Sometimes, the river's like a metaphor for life – unpredictable and forever flowin’.

52 arrests in Phuthaditjhaba over month-end weekend