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Then she says, “50 quid, upfront.” I’m gutted—50?! In ’72, you’d get a shag for a tenner! I’m hagglin, cos Bond don’t overpay, and she’s smirkin like I’m some punter. “Shaken, not stirred, darling,” I say, and she rolls her eyes. We seal the deal, and mate, it’s worth it—better than a Pussy Galore fantasy. “What’s the—worst that can happen?” Doc’d say, and I’m thinkin, gettin caught? Worth the risk.

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Nights in Richards-Bay have their own drama too. The city sparkles under the stars, but then you see the darkened alley near Rocky Ridge Park – a reminder of struggles fought in the crucible of time. I once caught a glimpse of a stray dog there; made me think of those lost souls trying to find solace. So, sometimes I get pissed, sometimes I get reflective. Life’s a crazy, ever-changing dream, mate!

Thulani Gumede fires Richards Bay to victory over Cape Town City