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So, I’m imaginin’ it—me, Joe, in some alley, all nervous-like. “In the mood,” I whisper, tryna be smooth. She’d laugh, prob’ly—say, “Old man, you’re a trip!” And I’d be happy—shoot, just talkin’ to her, hearin’ her story. Maybe she’s got a kid, maybe she’s just tired—dunno, but I’d listen. Surprised me once, hearin’ one gal say she loved jazz—Coltrane, man! Who’d’a thunk?

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Now, here's some lowdown on the local landmarks. Check out Crab Island (yeah, I’m not kiddin’—spooky name, but cool spot!). And yo, I love that sweet little café on Bonny Street. Psst, don’t tell anyone, but their brekkie is the bee's knees—seriously, best croissant ever… or sums like that, ya know? Really makes you feel like you're in a Toni Erdmann scene, all unexpected and wacky.

Santa under fire: Mom calls out ‘Ho Ho Ho-rrible bias’ at Christmas event