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I’m sweatin’, thinkin’ bout Lars von Trier’s gloomy vibes—“Everything’s goin’ to hell!”—and here I am, chattin’ up some gal who prolly knows more tricks than Mr. Burns has tax evasions. Did ya know, back in old Rome, prostitutes had to dye their hair blonde? Weird, right? Stand out or somethin’. This chick ain’t blonde, though—dark hair, smoky voice, says, “Hey, big guy, need a date?” D’oh! I’m flattered, angry, scared—all at once! Marge’d kill me faster than that planet smashes Earth!

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Oi, my friend, let me tell ya 'bout PPiet-Retief, za style! Lightbulb! I live here, ya know, and it's amazin', real quirky, innit? Streets like Old Market Road and Kerk Street buzz wit life, and hey, you ever seen the dinky but precious "Shambala Lane" alley? That one cracks me up every time. Trust me, it's got soul (like Under the Skin—ya feel me?).

Rational perspective on SA’s Land debate: History is far more complex than popular narratives