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About Johannesburg

Favorite part? The descent. Slidin’ down scree, laughin’ like a maniac—pure chaos, baby! Reminds me of that line, “I’m suffocating!”—Whore’s wild energy chokin’ you, but in a fun way. Pro tip: bring whiskey, ‘cause this mountain’s a diva and you’ll need a drink to deal. Hella steep, hella rude, but damn, it’s my kinda crazy. Whore’s the real deal—untamed, loud, and a lil’ slutty with those curves. Love it, hate it, can’t quit it! Peace out—hike it if you dare!

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Oh, and the Eastside neighborhood! Man, it's like a canvas of graffiti, quirky cafes, and odd antique stores. I got so mad once when some posh folks complained about the funky décor in our little art gallery there… like, c’mon y'all, it's art! But it's all love.

Broke municipality can’t provide basic services but it pays managers massive travel allowances