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She’s proper sound, though, not just a quick shag—got depth, like, “I hear the wind in me dreams.” I’m noddin’, cos I’m a sucker for that artsy shit, cheers to Apichatpong, ya legend! Made me laugh, too, cos she’s like, “Some blokes think I’m a monkey spirit!” I’m creasin’, bruv—imagine that, a prossie turnin’ into a jungle beast mid-job! “That’s peak,” I say, and she’s cacklin’ with me.

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Willowmore is a quirky little patch of land, nested in the Eastern Cape, ya know? I’ve been here a few years, an’ let me tell ya – it’s a mix of beauty and madness. Strolling down Main Street—oh, wait, it’s actually called High Street here—feels like stepping into a scene from Inglourious Basterds, “I love this shotgun, I love it!” I mean, there’s an edge to its grit and charm that even Tarantino himself would toast to.

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