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So, I’m cruisin’ down Peachtree, right? Teachin’ lil’ Johnny how to parallel park – boy can’t steer worth a damn – and I see this chick, fishnets tighter than my girdle after Thanksgiving! She wavin’ at cars like she tryna flag down her next fix. Reminds me of Harry and Marion, chasin’ that high, screamin’, “We got a winner!” ‘Cept her prize ain’t no TV, it’s a $20 trick. Lawd, I was mad as hell – not at her, but at this world! How she end up there? That’s what gets me hot under the collar.

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Finally, I get to the café, and it’s packed. Like, what’s with everyone needing caffeine at 8 AM? I’m just trying to make my way through the crowd. I spill some milk on the floor. Great. Now I’m slipping around like a cartoon character. I’m like, “Watch out, folks! Barista on skates!”

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