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So, picture this—I’m cruisin’, *Inherent Vice* style, fog rollin’ in, lookin’ for a gal. “What’s the deal, baby?” I’d say, tryna sound cool. She’d probly laugh—Kermit ain’t exactly a stud. Maybe she’d quote Doc: “This is some heavy shit!” and I’d croak, “Yeah, far out!” Total trip, man. Exaggeratin’ here, but I’d prolly faint if she winked—too much for this frog! You ever tried it? Spill the beans, pal—don’t leave me hangin’! Hi-ho!

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Finally, I corner the beast. It’s like a showdown, me vs. the rat. I’m sweating bullets, and just when I think I got him, he darts into a hole in the wall. I’m like, “Seriously? You gotta be kidding me!” I’m banging on the wall, yelling, “Come out, you little punk!” People are looking at me like I’m nuts. Whatever, they don’t know the struggle.

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