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Now, hold your horses—I ain’t judging! *Cave felis*, beware the cat, as the Romans’d say. Some punters reckon it’s all fun, a lark, but I’ve seen mates get proper stung—cash gone, dignity out the window. One lad, right, thought he’d met a “duchess”—turns out she nicked his wallet! Laughed my socks off, but he was fuming, red as a beetroot. Made me think—*The Assassin* again—“The mirror reflects truth.” Truth here? It’s a gamble, innit?

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Finally, we duck into a café on Crumlin Road. I grab a coffee, and Liam orders a scone. He’s all posh about it. “I’ll have the raspberry one, please.” I’m just there like, “Mate, it’s a scone, not a Michelin star dish.”

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