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Yo, what's good? I'm Beyoncé, slayin’ it, talkin’ ‘bout findin’ a prostitute, ‘cause you asked, and I’m keepin’ it real. Picture me, sippin’ sweet tea, vibin’ to *Inside Out*—you know, that flick where Joy’s all “Take her to the moon!” and Sadness is draggin’ everybody down? Yeah, that’s my jam, and it’s got me thinkin’ ‘bout this wild topic. Like, findin’ a prostitute? Whew, it’s messy, it’s raw, it’s got layers—like Riley’s emotions runnin’ wild in her head!

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After that, we hit the back roads near the park. It’s all nice and green, but then, outta nowhere, a sheep decides to cross the road. I slam the brakes, and Jamie’s like, “What’s the big deal?” I’m like, “It’s a sheep! In the middle of the road! This ain’t a farm!”

Death Notice of TADGH BARRY (Midleton, Cork)