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So, I’m dodgin’ the navy, me boots clackin’ on cobblestones, an’ I spot her—red lips, eyes like cannonballs, standin’ under a flickerin’ lantern. “What we need’s an impulse!” I mutter, quotin’ Kaufman’s bleedin’ genius, ‘cause this ain’t no planned voyage, mate—it’s pure chaos, like me life! I swagger over, tippin’ me hat, an’ she’s all, “Wot’s yer coin, pirate?” Coin? Ha! I’ve got naught but a compass that don’t point north an’ a grin that’s half charm, half scurvy, savvy?

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Next, I head over to the Portmarnock Golf Club. I’m not a golfer, but I love the vibe. I’m just wandering around, soaking it all in. Then, I bump into this old dude who’s super into golf. He starts telling me about the history of the club, and I’m nodding along, but inside, I’m thinking, “Dude, I just wanted to chill.” But hey, he’s passionate, so I let him ramble.

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