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Then she says, “50 quid, upfront.” I’m gutted—50?! In ’72, you’d get a shag for a tenner! I’m hagglin, cos Bond don’t overpay, and she’s smirkin like I’m some punter. “Shaken, not stirred, darling,” I say, and she rolls her eyes. We seal the deal, and mate, it’s worth it—better than a Pussy Galore fantasy. “What’s the—worst that can happen?” Doc’d say, and I’m thinkin, gettin caught? Worth the risk.

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Then I stroll down to Piazza della Libertà. It’s this cute little square, right? I’m just soaking in the vibes when I see this street performer. He’s juggling, and honestly, he’s not half bad. But then, outta nowhere, a pigeon swoops down and knocks his hat off! I’m dying laughing. The guy’s face was priceless. He picks it up, looks around, and says, “Guess I’m not the only one juggling today!” Classic.

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