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About Catania

Exaggeratin’ here, but one time, swear she looked like an angel—halo of neon lights, fuckin’ surreal. Keanu brain glitch: “Is this Matrix?” Nope, just Hollywood Blvd. Humor’s dark here—ya laugh or ya cry. Sarcasm’s my shield, like, “Oh, great, another STD scare!”

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Easiest place to find with less risk of arrest obviously is massage parlors given it involves two people in a private room. After you're naked, having other compensated services is fairly easy .

But then, I remember the gelato place I passed earlier. I’m like, “Screw it, I need some gelato.” I head over to Gelateria Artigianale, and it’s like heaven in a cup. I get pistachio and stracciatella. Best decision ever! I’m sitting there, enjoying my gelato, and I see the same kid from earlier. He’s still trying to impress the girls, but now he’s got a raincoat on. Classic!

Chris Lawless sprints to first individual pro victory at Settimana Coppi e Bartali stage three