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About Naples

Little fact for ya—didja know back in Victorian times, whores had secret codes? Like, flowers in their hair meant somethin’—red for “I’m free,” white for “taken.” Sneaky, right? Surprised me, blew my twisted mind! Imagine that—pimp strollin’ by, “What’s your totem, babe?” Hahaha! I’d tip my hat, if I had one. Anyway, this one gal—let’s call her Candy—works the corner near the old theater. She’s got sass, tells me, “Cash upfront, clown!” Made me cackle—love the guts!

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1. She's Clearly Out of Your League · 2. You Get Digits Without Asking · 3. She's Friendly to Random Gentlemen · 4. She Seems Impatient If You Talk.

First off, I hit the road on Via Roma. Traffic was a nightmare. I mean, come on! It’s a Tuesday, not a freakin’ Friday! I’m stuck behind this old lady in a Fiat. Bless her heart, but she was going 20 in a 50 zone. I’m yelling, “C’mon, lady! I got cargo to move!” But she’s just vibing to her old-school tunes. I can’t even.

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