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So ye creep round, eyes sharp. “Light bends around us”—movie again, mate—feels like that, dodgin shadows, chasin a thrill. Me, I’d overthink it—ooh, is she dodgy? Happy tho, if she’s got a laugh, makes it less grim. We swears, it’s a mad dance—half sleazy, half sad. What’s yer take, eh, precious?

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Then, I hit up the beach at Kamiiso. The waves were crashing, and I thought, “This is it! Life is good!” But then, outta nowhere, this seagull swoops down and snatches my bread! Like, excuse me, Mr. Bird, that was my breakfast! I was so mad, I almost yelled at it. But then I just laughed. I mean, who loses a battle to a bird?

Oceanside Oarai a family-friendly getaway in Japan